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BATON ROUGE, LA. - The White House announced today that President Bush has successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more than double its original selling price of $11,250,000.


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A German couple who went to a fertility clinic after eight years of marriage have found out why they are still childless: they weren't having sex !


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From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:

What Makes 100%?
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%
We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.. How about achieving 103%?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

What makes up 100% in life?


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You should be aware of this if you are going to be travelling in the near future!
US airports will be using a new machine for checking people boarding the aircraft. This will start on about the 1st March 2004.

Click on the URL below and drag your mouse over picture to see an example of how the device functions.

New Airport Security Device [SWF][68Ko]

TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You retire on the income.

INDIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You worship them.

PAKISTAN ECONOMICS
You don't have any cows.
You claim that the Indian cows belong to you.
You ask the US for financial aid, China for military aid,
British for Warplanes, Italy for machines, Germany for
technology, French for submarines, Switzerland for loans,
Russia for drugs and Japan for equipment. You buy the cows
with all this and claim of exploitation by the world.


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GEORGE BUSH: When you rearrange the letters: HE BUGS GORE

DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM

EVANGELIST: When you rearrange the letters: EVIL'S AGENT

PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER

DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters: A ROPE ENDS IT

THE MORSE CODE: When you rearrange the letters: HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES: When you rearrange the letters: CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY: When you rearrange the letters: IS NO AMITY

MOTHER-IN-LAW: When you rearrange the letters: WOMAN HITLER

SNOOZE ALARMS: When you rearrange the letters: ALAS! NO MORE Z'S

A DECIMAL POINT: When you rearrange the letters: I'M A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES: When you rearrange the letters: THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO: When you rearrange the letters: TWELVE PLUS ONE

And for the grand finale this is about ex-president Bill Clinton

PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USA: When you rearrange the letters (With
no letters left over and using each letter only once): HE FINDS INTERNS TO COPULATE

The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks, interviews, and testing were done, there were three finalists, two men and a woman.

For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. 'We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill her!' The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife.' The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.'

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the man came out with tears in his eyes. 'I tried, but I can't kill my wife.' The agent said, 'You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.'

Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given instructions to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her row. 'This gun is loaded with blanks,' she said. 'I had to beat him to death with the chair.'

Wanted to inform you about someone in Trayning who apparently hates dogs and has shot and killed a large number of them in the last month. They think whoever is responsible may travel to other towns and do the same thing...... wanted to warn you to watch your dogs.

They do have a possible suspect but he will not confess.... I have included a picture of him. See attached....... a true Professional!! Whoever is doing this terrible thing must really hate dogs.

Photo of the suspect